Lucretia The Chipmunk

LUCRETIA IS A NASTY CHIPMUNK
AND SHE RESIDES IN MY GARAGE
IF I COULD EVER CATCH HER
SHE’LL RECEIVE A SHOTGUN BARRAGE

SHE GETS INTO EVERYTHING I OWN
RIPS AND TEARS AND SHREDS
AND IF I HAD MY WAY ABOUT IT
SHE’D MOST ASSUREDLY BE DEAD

ALL OF OUR FLOWERS SHE CHEWS UP
NIBBLES RIGHT THROUGH THEIR STEMS
I CAN IMAGINE THE JOY SHE GETS
GLEEFULLY DESTROYING ALL OF THEM

ANYTHING PAPER I’M FORCED TO HIDE
AS SHE USES IT TO LINE HER NEST
MANUALS, BROCHURES, NEWSPAPERS
SHREDDED BY THIS DEMONIC PEST

I’M ALWAYS FINDING HER STINKY POOP
IN PLACES MOST UNEXPECTED
FORCING ME TO WASH MY HANDS
THE LOOK ON  MY FACE, DISGUSTED

SHE’S AN ELUSIVE LITTLE RODENT
ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO CATCH
WHEN I DO I KNOW WHERE SHE’LL GO
SHE’LL BE BURIED IN MY RHUBARB PATCH

Tuesday, June 21, 2022